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Choose Your Own Adventure: JIRA Edition
You awake to find a scrap of paper at your feet. On the front are the words ISSUE TRACKER: REGRESSION. You turn it over and begin to read.

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-= XI =-

The iron shackles were forged to the dimensions of your limbs, and you slip them on readily. Your body decays more slowly than your consciousness, and after mere centuries the restraints can be removed again, leaving you to mindlessly shuffle the corridors at length.

Refusing to address the regression at all? That's dereliction of duty! It's just plain lazy, and you should be ashamed for suggesting it. You score 0% completion, and should probably cheat your way back to the previous page and try to actually come up with a fix.


-= XII =-

The citadel rises from unseen depths into strange spirals, as if it was constructed in more dimensions than you can perceive. When your eyes can catch focus on the shape, you separate the structure into two; a primary mass rising vertically with a tower growing from its side. Judging from how the brickwork ages and colours as you look further down, you would guess the structure was built in phases, across many years, and perhaps more than one architect.

You begin your inspection with the central tower. The uppermost floors are clearly much less weathered than the layer below and the tower to the side, although they too are starting to show their age. Your attention is immediately held by the huge stained glass window, apparently highlighting and illustrating the citadels interior spaces. The window is angled strangely, and heavily reinforced by buttresses, apparently to accommodate some eccentricity of earlier wings of the fortress into the design.

Quoth 2.2 introduced a loop of three Quoth demos when you launch the mod without a map specified. The demos are "base.dem", "coop2.dem" and "vongug.dem". Each of these demos is in a different pak file! The first demo was recorded specifically for the new feature, but the other two were just demos that were supplied with earlier patches for players to launch manually. The demos are launched by a line added to quake.rc, which names these demos as what to play.

To investigate how the demos work in Warpspasm, TURN TO PAGE FOUR

If you have now decided on a solution, TURN TO PAGE FOURTEEN 
-= XIII =-

You raise your chisel and are just about to begin work on the outer wall, when a Shambler smashes you to the ground with a single blow. YOU ARE DEAD.

As you bleed out for the final time, the spirit of Preach possesses the Shambler. It observes that by demanding that an existing map change itself for a new patch, you are changing the rules after the game has already ended. Backwards compatibility fixes are about avoiding exactly this. Imagine if the next patch changes the demos again - should Warpspasm forever be changing to suit the latest trends? Blackness envelopes you before you hear if this was a rhetorical question. You score 0% completion, let us hope that the next traveller into the dungeon lives longer.


-= XIV =-

You unchain the Tome of Construction and open it out on the ground before you. The blank pages rattle, waiting for you to summon their text. You take one final look at the intertwined citadels then bow your head and begin

If you think that this bug should be rejected as WONTFIX

If you want to change Warpspasm to fix this bug

If you wish to change which demos are loaded in Quoth

If you wish to remove the feature of Quoth which caused this bug

If you have a different fix, inscribe it into the page of the book below

Got away with posting all of that without someone interposing a comment that screws up the numbering!

(This is a test comment to make sure that link works too) 
This Was Neat 
Have A Beer 
I Do 
so should you 
@mfx -- Hahaha 
*QA Lead self twitches* 
I Got Scolded Because I Went The WONT FIX Route. 
Holy shit, this is undoubtedly the most creative thing I've read on this site so far! Nice metaphors in the italicized parts. Hats off, mister preacher man sir! *applauds frantically in a standing ovation* 
PS: What Does JIRA Stand For? 
Stooping down, you take a closer look at the book. Touching the page you see a dot form and realize that the magic within the pages allows you to write unhindered by an implement. You begin to write...

Quakespasm doesn't play demos normally, hence rendering this a moot, though invariably entertaining, discussion.

You close the book, place it on the lone dusty shelf in the dungeon, and peer through the cleft. Suddenly a Shambler crashes through the wall and a memory of another life floats to the top of your mind... 
Nice One Preach... 
...four and a half stars. 
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