It takes two fools at least to argue.

Chesshire ~ Alice2 

thumbs up for those except the meat one ;-) 

If you end up with a boring miserable life because you listened to your mom, your dad, your teacher, your priest, or some guy on television telling you how to do your shit, then you deserve it. 

An optimist, he looks at the glass of milk and says, it is half full.
A pessimist, he looks at the glass and says, it is half empty.
I look at the glass and say it is sour.

Jacques 'Jacques' Liverot 

Explanations exist; they have existed for all time; there is always a well-known solution to every human problem; neat, plausible, and wrong 

pestis eram vivus,moriens tuas mors ero.

as long as pest was alive, your death will be dying. 

They say that eons ago, a superior species evolved from the apes.

Can someone please tell me where to find them?

Cuz I'm stuck hanging out with these guys. 

"Living, I was your plague -- dying, I shall be your death" 

I translated as it came to me,
but google didn't read Edgar Allen Poe. 

Do not speak unless you can improve the silence. 

One probably could not devise a better system for keeping people with humanistic values away from power than by confining them to decade-long graduate programs with a long future of transient adjunct positions making less than the minimum wage.

Been watching the spurt of "So you want to be a..." youtube videos from a couple years ago lately, where people bitch about their professions. My favourite opening:

Q: I want to become an electrical engineer.
A: Are you completely insane? Have you no human soul?
Lol. 

"Ow, my sperm!"
- Fry 

"it didn't hurt that time..." 

�There is indeed a great deal of futility amongst the human race which we do not commonly see, for it all forms part of our illusion; but let a man be much annoyed by something that others do, so that he is separated from them and has to leave them, and looks back at what they are doing, and he'll see at once all manner of whimsical absurdities that he had not noticed before.�
-Lord Dunsany 

I can't change the world but I can describe the world and let them think about it

Axl Rose 

no witness evidence alone 

The most veritable proof for existence of intelligent life in space is the lack of contact.
-- Stanislaw Lem 

'I think the overall highlight was that it used a standard theme, standard monsters, standard weapons, no fancy-assed engine faggotry(...)'

-Shambler 

"It's always night, or we wouldn't need light" -- Thelonious Monk 

Axl Rose quote beats the philosopher's, pants down.

Been digging up a few anti-religion quotes -

"I contend that we are both atheists. I just believe in one fewer god than you do. When you understand why you dismiss all the other possible gods, you will understand why I dismiss yours." - Stephen Roberts

�Those who can make you believe absurdities, can make you commit atrocities.� - Voltaire

Eskimo: "If I did not know about God and sin, would I go to hell?" Priest: "No, not if you did not know." Eskimo: "Then why did you tell me?" - Annie Dillard 

The sea doesn't care. It doesn't care if you are thirsty. It doesn't care if you are hungry or have a full belly. It doesn't care if you are too hot, or too cold. It doesn't care if you can breathe or not breathe. It will try to rot you, crush you, wash away everything that matters to you and when it's done it still won't care whether or not you make it past it's challenges. It shall continue to attack you because that's the nature of the sea.

Forget this and you will rue the day that you did. 

"Hope is the first step on the road to disappointment." 

 

�Politicians and diapers must be changed often, and for the same reason.�


― Mark Twain 

Totalitarianism demands, in fact, the continuous alteration of the past, and in the long run probably demands a disbelief in the very existence of objective truth. The friends of totalitarianism in this country usually tend to argue that since absolute truth is not attainable, a big lie is no worse than a little lie. It is pointed out that all historical records are biased and inaccurate, or on the other hand, that modern physics has proven that what seems to us the real world is an illusion, so that to believe in the evidence of one's senses is simply vulgar philistinism.

God, how this describes the most misguided of my colleagues...